We are getting ready to leave for another show. Were hoping to see you before going. There were no guarantee's. It seems that there has been much manipulation and you are in the middle again. It's just not fair to you to be in this position.
I've always said, "I am a big boy and I can take care of myself, I'll get through it". Then I have such an overwhelming feeling of disgust and sorrow because I think of you and your brother. He was six and did not have the mental capacity or ability to deal with the hatred that was targeted towards me. You are now thirteen and you no better have the mental capacity and ability to take care of yourself or to deal with this hatred as you did when you were three, yet the only way for you to cope is the same way your brother did. You and your brother were forced to pledge your allegiance to one parent over the other.
I have no doubt that your brother is the driving force in this hatred targeted towards me. It's not his fault that he was taught anger and hatred and where to place it.
While I understand that this is what an allienating parent does, and it disgusts me, I must remember that it is a mental defect and a sickness. I am sorry for you. My heart is broken because of your pain and confusion.
Though I don't see your brother and I ever having a relationship, atleast not a positive one, I think of him often and have the same feelings towards him as I do you, love and sorrow. I had him from the time he was born until he was six. You were 2 years, 10 months old when for whatever reasons I decided that enough was enough living in the conditions that were present at the time. That was in September of 99'. We have been connected for 4 years longer than your brother and I and it has been a hard road to travel keeping you and I together. I love you and miss you. You will always be my baby girl.
Your stepmom wants winter to be over. She's not thrilled with cold weather and certainly not with snow except when it falls for the first time.
I am so glad that we shared the joys of snow together. I am happy that we got to ride down the hill together on the sleds, to throw snowballs at each other though you always seemed to get the best of me. I am glad that you are somewhere happily playing in the snow today. We wish you were here and so do your freinds.
We love and miss you. Have fun in the snow.
Love DAD
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