Today is such a wonderful day! We feel for those in the Texas and Oklahoma tornadoes. It's cause for pause. We pray for those that are affected by those storms. We pray for those of us that have it better as it could have just as easily been us or our loved ones.
I thank my Lord for answering my many prayers for watching over my children during the many life tragedies that they have had and continue to endure. I wished that I could have helped them through tough times and enjoyed sharing the good times. My absence wasn't my choice. I wasn't able to get the courts to see it to allow me access to my children so that I may develop healthy relationships with them. I cherished the times that I had with my daughter though I knew that it was such a strain on her. I can only imagine what she had to endure as a result of my insistence to be in her life. We developed some sort of a bond but it seems that it just didn't take hold. What is important to one parent is not always whats important to the other.
I had higher expectations for Brooke than I did for Matthew. I suppose it is because I had more interaction with Brooke than Matthew. We went through struggles together. She was stronger for it. As for her brother, the courts gave him the power to make it his choice in the decisions that he was making as a six (6) year old and he's been making his own decisions since. *(Sarcasm) "Let's just let all six (6) year old's rule our country and make all the decisions"! Thanks a lot Forsyth County Courts. *See Tuesday, February 2, 2010 Post!
It was not surprising that Matthew didn't finish high school. I suppose his mother should be proud that he did get his GED. I am not surprised in receiving information that Matthew is having troubles with intoxicants and with the law. I am a little surprised to hear of Brooke's troubles with those things. I hated to receive news that my daughter quit school in November shortly after her 16th birthday. I should not have been surprised. *(Sarcasm) After all, it was her decision, her choice!
It is difficult to learn of and watch the things that your children struggle with and want to help them and guide them and can't. *(Sarcasm) I thank their mother for her parenting skills and her teaching the children that they make their own decisions! "It's your choice". If a parent is lazy and has low expectations, then this is what they will get in return. I would have never given them the choice to shut their mother out of their lives!
I wonder if it would have been any different if I had been allowed to play an active role in their lives?
Today is a day to be thankful for if for no other reason than to be alive.
Love to the children,
Matt
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2 comments:
Hi Matt i have read your blog and can sympathize with you, I also have gone through the same experience. There comes a time after you have tried every endeavor , emotional and financially to step back. To take care of yourself and hope that one day your children grow up and see through deceiving and the manipulation they have lived with. I love my children with all my heart and hope that one day they realize how much we have missed . Dave
Thanks for your reply Dave. I hate to hear that you have had to endure some same experiences. I feel for your children as they live longer with the effects of PAS. Unfortunately life can take so many unexpected turns that sometimes it is too late when realizations happen. Take care and I hope your children find their way and that you will carry faith in your future endeavors.
Praying for you and your children,
Matt
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